Blessings of honesty

This morning as I laid next to my dear, sweet, wonderful, and peacefully-sleeping Matthew, I took a few moments to think about all I was grateful for. Although we're working it out each day (some days more than others ) he grows more and more precious to me. Sometimes I'm almost afraid to acknowledge how happy I am. I just had no idea that marriage (hard work!) could be so blissful!!! Really!

Anyway, as soon as I started expressing gratitude for all of the wonderful qualities of Matt and this marriage, and all the comforts of the wonderful home and life we're building together, it struck me that what I am most grateful for is honesty - Truth! And that led me to think about where this relationship was last year at this time, even 8 months ago. Although we were 'heady' over one another, the relationship was sort of perched on this precarious and not-so-solid treetop. We were going nowhere, but wanting so badly to move ahead. We did not see how to do this under the watchful eye of the 'the public' and kept going deeper and deeper into seclusion in an effort to figure things out in private. We also desperately wanted to live morally and were finding that more and more difficult as well.

That's when I called you. I felt ridiculous and stupid, but I poured out my story to you and you told me that I had to be moral and honest and that I had to be willing to have my actions exposed to the light of day. I had no idea how to do that, nor did I even want to have the world looking on while I figured things out. Matt pretty much felt the same way too. I had no thoughts that we would ever come to any conclusions about our relationship, let alone be married.

As we both pondered what it meant to be truthful and honest, the idea came very strongly (first to him) that we needed to be married! What an utterly ridiculous thought! How could it ever work? As we continued to cherish our desire for morality and honesty, this idea of marriage kept coming to us. And then even a ring - a ring that I didn't want and was not looking for- plopped right down in Matt's lap. And the ring was 1/7 th of its original marked price!!! And then a friend told us about a legal marriage ceremony (self-uniting) which would be easy and convenient. As we continued to marvel, yet remain unconvinced at the same time, the way was being paved to do what we really wanted to do - live honestly.

Fast forward.... now that we are married, we really do see that the problem wasn't the age difference and all of the family problems or gossip and scandal surrounding a relationship such as ours in the small community of a college where we both were visible. It was the fact that we were trying to hide and therefore deny honesty and truth its rightful place in our lives.

I will be ever-so-grateful for your stand for morality, for truth and for honesty, and for your courage to stand up to me and point out that I was indeed not being moral. I truly had no idea - I was hypnotized by the thoughts ever recurring to me about how things really were!!! Truth, honesty, morality. Matt and I often have discussions about these things now. We recognized that they are what saved us, and we so often are able to see that what appears to be a certain problem to the world is really not that problem at all, but a veil which is trying to hide truth - Truth itself.

So dear Elise, my gratitude this morning -not a long list of things - consisted of lots of thoughts about Truth, and the courage and love of those who stand for it, namely YOU!!!!!!

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

BIG HUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lorie